We had auditions for Sing Live’s “Sing Swing” concert today (there are no auditions to get into the chorus – this was for solos and/or ensembles). For those of you who have been reading my blogs for more than the past 6 months or so, you may remember that during my last audition (which was also the first one in my entire life), I sucked balls. I used a song that I had only started rehearsing a week and a half earlier (because one of the people who picked the singers had said my original song, the one I had been rehearsing for a month and a half already, was too low for a soprano), it was a relatively difficult song for a beginner to sing, I had JUST started singing lessons, my nerves were at at all-time high (first audition ever, not very comfortable with the process, etc.)…you get the point. So I was not prepared (emotionally OR skill-wise) and it really showed. My breathing sucked and I went flat on just about every high note I sang. I wasn’t surprised that it looked like they shut off the recorder a few bars into my song or that, of course, I wasn’t chosen for a solo or an ensemble – I wasn’t ready and I didn’t deserve it.

Fast forward to now. After getting a solid base of singing lessons with Shirley and a false start with Novie, I’ve now been studying under Felicia since April or May, and she just ROCKS. She tells me specifically what I do right and what I do wrong and how to make it even better and she probably gets frustrated as hell with me when I tell her I don’t think I’m as good as she says I am, but she still tolerates me anyway (grin). And this time I was PREPARED. I had a song that fit my personality. I had some gestures and facial expressions to go with it. I knew it backwards and forwards. It didn’t have any really high notes. I followed my mantra to “breathe and pronounce” (the former is my problem when I’m nervous, the latter is ALL the time unless I think about it). And I kept my fingers crossed.

Kenny had asked if he could be one of our accompanists but apparently they were “good enough” with just Gloria & Angela this time around. Of the two, I would have preferred Gloria (much better piano player and, of course, we’re friends), but there was only a 50/50 chance of getting her. As it turned out, I got Angela. Oh well, that’s still OK. I got there around 11:40am and although they were running a few minutes later, my rehearsal time was 11:49am – Angela and I went into the rehearsal room, I explained what I needed from her (I was even more comfortable with that – I actually KNEW what I needed this time. Again, MUCH more prepared). We ran through the song twice and I gave her some direction of the speed (first time was too slow, then, after I corrected her, a little too fast. Second time was perfect).

And then suddenly, holy crap, it’s 11:56am, it’s my turn and I’m not all that nervous?!?! Sure, I’m a LITTLE nervous, but really, not NEARLY as bad as I was the last time. The panel this time were Kevin and Krista (sp?) (Dirk wasn’t there – he had to work and, of course, John is in England until early next month). Krista recognized me even though we had never formally met and I only go to see VOL 2 or 3 times a year (the curse of being a memorable 4’7″ strikes again – grin) And I smiled. And I talked. And I joked around. And I sang. And I breathed. And I pronounced. And because I was doing everything right, I even did a little bit of what virtually everyone involved had told me to do…I. Had. FUN! And holy shit, I’m pretty sure I NAILED it!

I guess we’ll find out about who got solos and ensembles sometime in the next week or two. Do I have a chance of getting a part? I have no idea. Although it would be awesome to get something, I honestly don’t care…I finally did the best that I possibly could have done, when it counted. I didn’t let my nerves get to me, I did was I was supposed to do, I performed at my potential and was a bezillion times better than at my last audition. Best of all, for once, ever my own worst critic, I can see for myself that I’ve improved and, most importantly, might be getting an inkling of the realization that maybe, just maybe, my singing really doesn’t suck (grin). Whether I get something or not, it doesn’t matter – I’ve already gotten something far better: more confidence.

Will post when I get the snail mail with the list of soloists and ensembles from them.